How To Communicate With Your Child Using Their Love Language


Hey Mama! You know your babies more than anyone, but do you know their love language? This is a question a lot of parents don’t really think to ask, but communicating with your child using their love language can make all the difference in how safe they feel in the world. The Rey to Z team takes their kid’s physical and mental health as seriously as they do making quality custom embroidered hats. That’s why the have created this guide to help mamas like you understand your littles even more. We hope it helps! 

How To Communicate With Your Child Using their Love Language

The first step in understanding how to communicate with your child using their love language is to determine what their love language is. This can be a bit tricky since little ones haven’t figured out how to communicate their needs yet. A great resource is, of course, the original book itself, The Five Love Languages of Children by Gary Chapman

Once you have determined your kiddo’s love language you can take a look at how communication can be different for each type of child. Here are the 5 Love Languages: 

  1. Words of affirmation
  2. Acts of service
  3. Receiving gifts
  4. Quality time
  5. Physical touch

Rey to Z  has broken down this guide on how to best communicate in every style. 

Words of Affirmation 

These kiddos love to hear the people in their lives say wonderful things about them out loud. We know that sometimes we have a need to communicate something with them that is not always positive, but we need to be extra careful when communicating in a verbal way with these kids. Word choices can both make them feel loved, or hurt them easily. 

Helpful Tips: 

  • Try to say things aloud every day that affirm your child. Things like “You are so helpful.” “You make me smile.” or “You are one great big sister!” 
  • When you need to communicate something negative, be extra careful in choosing your words. Much like adult communication is helped by “I” statements, communication and discipline with these kiddo’s is also improved this way. Fro example: “I feel frustrated that I have asked you several times to get your shoes on, can you please show me what a big boy you are and put them on?” Instead of: “You are so frustrating.” These types of absolute statements can be devastating to a Words of Affirmation kiddo, as they internalize and store your words. 

Fun Idea: 

Get your cutie a Rey to Z  baseball cap or pom pom beanie in their favorite color and add their initial. Then, write them a little letter to go with it, telling them how special they are. 

Acts of Service

These little ones thrive on being served. That may sound a bit over blown, but truly, they enjoy the feeling of being cared for. These cuties will feel the warm fuzzies extra when you help them with a project or take the time to make their favorite snack. These gestures make them feel seen. Exercise caution when teaching these kiddos independence. Though it is hugely important, remember to navigate this in a more delicate way. Instead of saying “You can do that on your own, you don’t need me,” say something like “You are so smart, I know you can do this all by yourself! I love helping you with things, but it is also so fun how you can help me too!” 

Helpful Tips: 

  • Try doing something special for them like helping them redecorate their room, work on a project or even do some self care- like a nice foot or back rub. 
  • Surprise them with something special that you did for them for no reason, like setting up a playdate with their favorite friend, or creating time in your day to help them with a task that overwhelms them instead of rushing them. 

Fun Idea: 

A person’s love language is often the way they express love to others as well. Help foster your kiddo’s love language by helping them find opportunities to serve others. Volunteer with them to help clean up the local park, or make cookies for the neighbors. If you know someone who has recently had a baby, let them help you pick out one of their fun baby baseball hats and deliver it to the new parents.

Receiving Gifts 

These little ones love the rush of opening that pretty paper and finding a treasure inside. Thai love language can sound a bit “high maintenance,” but truly a gift doesn’t have to be expensive. The sweet thing about these cuties is that the simplest thing, like surprising them with a trip to get ice cream, or a new toy, can make them over the moon happy. They also tend to be sentimental and like to hang onto things that have been given to them. It can be fun to give them family heirlooms as they grow up, or even create a treasure box for them of keepsakes. 

Helpful tips: 

  • Birthdays are a big deal to these littles. It doesn’t mean that things have to be expensive or overblown, but a thoughtful and meaningful gift will go a long way with these kids.
  • When talking to these kids about being frugal, try to word it in a way that doesn’t create a feeling of lack. Instead of “We can’t afford that” or “You don’t need that,” try saying something like “It’s going to be a great feeling when you can save up and buy that,” or “I’d love to get you something special. Let’s look at some things that are smaller and put this on your birthday list.” 

Fun Idea: 

These babes love to help give gifts as well. Let them help you pick out gifts for friends and family and present them. Check out their monogrammed baseball caps for everyone in the fam! Siblings, mom, dad, grandparents, you name it! Let them pick them out and deliver them and they will be full of warmth. 

Quality Time 

These cuties are so much fun because they are thrilled to just spend time with you. Family vacations, trips to the park…they live their lives in moments. The best way to bond with these babes is to drop everything (including that phone,) and spend one on one time with them. This is especially important if they have siblings and are always receiving divided attention. Scheduling mamma and me days will mean the world to them. 

Helpful Tips: 

  • Be aware as new babies come to the family, or situations change like a parent traveling or taking a new job, this can upset these little ones. Take extra care during transition times to spend time with them. 
  • Instead of saying things like “I’m too busy to do that with you right now,” say something like “I am busy at the moment but time with you is very important to me. Let’s schedule time together to do this ___.” (Set a solid time  and be sure to follow through on that time.) 

Fun Idea: 

Plan a mama and me day. Have their favorite breakfast. Go somewhere they love. Listen to their favorite songs. Take all of the ‘themness’ that you can. You could order them a cute beanie and matching mama beanie, or choose from a selection of beanies for women and have a mama and little day in matching hats! They also offer matching baseball caps. 

Physical Touch 

These sensitive little ones tend to be very intuitive. They feel what others feel and that can mean happiness or sadness. It’s important to remember to be careful of your vibe around them. Not to be inauthentic, but they are feelers, so keep the emotions you have in check when possible. Also the way to their little hearts is super easy. Hugs, back rubs, snuggles…all of the good stuff. 

Helpful Tips: 

  • These kids benefit a ton from pets. If you are able to have a pet, these physical kiddos will thrive from warm puppy licks and petting and playing with their animals. 
  • Be aware of the hurt it can cause for these cuties when they get into physical altercations with siblings or friends. A little push can be devastating to their hearts. 

Fun Idea:

Your little one would probably love a pedicure! Go for a mama and kiddo pedicure date and bring along some brand new Rey to Z striped socks to put on afterward! They will love the feel of new cozy socks on freshly pampered tootsies.  

We hope this guide helps you communicate and connect with your little ones and maybe even understand yourself a bit more! 
Rey to Z  sees you and they know you are doing your best. That’s why they do thier best to provide every style you can imagine and make it customizable for you and your unique family. They also always offer 15% off your first order when you sign up for texts and free shipping on orders $60 or more. Also, if you love them as much as they love you, they offer a Refer a Friend program, you and your bestie both get $5 off your order.